Donor Story: Starting a family conversation about giving back

For many families, talking about money with adult children can feel uncomfortable.

Parents may want their children to understand the family’s financial and philanthropic plans, but don’t want conversations about wealth to become conversations about inheritance. They may worry that discussing the family’s assets too early—or too openly—could change the way their children think about money, work or their own financial independence.

For Dave and Shannon—long-time Canada Gives donor clients—the answer came when they changed the conversation. Instead of talking about how much they’d accumulated, they started talking about what their family could do with it.

The retired Ontario couple had spent their working lives building a successful home renovation business. They worked hard, saved carefully and eventually sold the business, giving them the financial security to enjoy a comfortable retirement. Over the years, they had also become increasingly philanthropic. They supported several charities and causes that were important to them, but as retirement approached, they began thinking about philanthropy in a different way.

They wanted giving to become part of their family’s story. And they wanted their adult children—and eventually their grandchildren—to understand why it mattered.

A different way to talk about wealth

Dave and Shannon had initially been hesitant to have detailed conversations with their children about their financial circumstances. Like many parents, they wanted their children to establish their own careers, make their own financial decisions and build their own lives.

But they also recognized that avoiding the conversation altogether could mean missing an important opportunity to pass along something more valuable than financial assets: their family’s values. Working with Canada Gives helped them find a different way into the conversation. The starting point wasn’t, “Here’s what we have.” It was, “Here’s what we believe.”

They began talking with their children about the causes they supported, why certain charities mattered to the family and how fortunate they felt to have the ability to give back. Eventually, another part of the conversation emerged: taxes.

“We all have to pay taxes,” Dave explained to his children. “But we have an opportunity to redirect a portion of those tax dollars toward causes that matter to our family.”

That idea created a lightbulb moment.

Turning tax planning into family philanthropy

A charitable donation can provide tax benefits because eligible donations generate official donation receipts that can be used to claim charitable donation tax credits, subject to applicable Canada Revenue Agency rules. For families who are already committed to charitable giving, a Donor Advised Fund—or as we call it at Canada Gives, a Foundation account—can provide a structured way to combine charitable planning with family engagement.

For Dave and Shannon, this reframed philanthropy. They weren’t suggesting that their children should focus on their family’s wealth. They were showing them that, because the family had been fortunate, they had choices about how to direct some of the resources that would otherwise simply become part of their tax bill.

Their Canada Gives Foundation account became the vehicle for putting that philosophy into practice. A DAF allows donors to contribute assets, receive the applicable charitable tax benefit and recommend grants to eligible charities over time. It can also provide a framework for bringing multiple generations into philanthropic decision-making. For Dave and Shannon, that last point became particularly important.

Bringing the next generation to the table

Their adult children gradually became part of conversations about the family’s Foundation account. Rather than telling their children which charities to support, Dave and Shannon asked questions:

• What issues matter to you?
• What would you like to change?
• Which organizations are doing work you believe deserves more support?

The conversations didn’t always produce the same answers. And that was part of the point. Philanthropy became a way for the family to learn more about one another. Their children began identifying organizations and causes they cared about, while Dave and Shannon could share the experiences that had shaped their own giving. Together, they could decide where the family’s charitable dollars could make a meaningful difference.

Eventually, the grandchildren began to hear these conversations, too. For Dave and Shannon, this was an important distinction. Their family wasn’t simply discussing what would happen to their wealth one day. They were discussing what they could do with their good fortune today.

A DAF as a family conversation starter

A Donor Advised Fund can provide families with a practical framework for this kind of intergenerational philanthropy. Rather than making charitable giving an occasional or ad hoc activity, a Canada Gives Foundation account can help families develop a more deliberate, strategic approach to giving. Donor clients can involve family members in recommending grants, researching charities and thinking about the impact they want their giving to create.

Canada Gives is dedicated to helping Foundation families create meaningful impact, build lasting legacies and support the causes they care about most. For some families, that means establishing a long-term charitable strategy. For others, it means finding ways to engage children and grandchildren in philanthropy.

For Dave and Shannon, it became both.

Their DAF has given them a way to talk about tax and estate planning without making the conversation primarily about wealth. It’s allowed them to talk about responsibility, generosity and the opportunity that comes with financial success. And perhaps most importantly, it’s given their children a seat at the table.

Passing along values—not just assets

Dave and Shannon know that their children will eventually inherit financial assets. But they also hope they’ll inherit something else: an understanding that financial success creates an opportunity to support a range of causes. Their conversations around philanthropy have helped make that lesson tangible.

The family now has a shared understanding that charitable giving isn’t simply something that happens after a lifetime of accumulating wealth. It can be part of how a family uses its resources throughout its lifetime. For families who find it difficult to talk to adult children about wealth, sometimes the easiest place to start isn’t with wealth at all. They can start with values, with gratitude and with the causes that matter. Then they can talk about how the family can use its good fortune to help others.

For Dave and Shannon, that simple shift opened the door to a conversation they once found difficult to begin. Their Canada Gives Foundation account has helped them turn philanthropy into a family activity—and, in the process, create a lasting legacy that’s measured not simply by what they leave behind, but by the good their family can do together today.

The Canada Gives Team

To explore how a DAF might help you build a legacy that reflects your charitable values, consider opening a Foundation account with Canada Gives. Our team is here to help guide your charitable giving with flexibility and foresight. To learn more, contact a member of our team.